She opened her eyes. She was blinded by what was supposed to be a rounded light that was broken into strips of blaze that pierced through her window. How ironic that nothing could shut the color of the world from outside but when she looked around her room, everything was very much gray.
She had roots painted all over her cheeks with no flowers or trees that will remind you of the beauty of spring. Her fingers stood side by side as she swiped them across her cheek. Roots gone. But as soon as she lifted her head and looked at her pillow, the roots were there and no amount of swiping from her fingers can make this go away.
What her legs were supposed to do, her arms had to do it this morning. She sat by the edge of her bed for 3 minutes. Finally, courage possesed her body, and both her palms that lay flat on the bed tried to leave deep imprints. Standing on legs like jello, she tried to move away from her bed that has practically become her universe for weeks. One step. Two steps. Three. By the time she took her fourth, she collapsed to her left. Her left hand pressed hard against the wall, it almost left cracks. But she tried to be brave and took her fifth step. That was succeeded by a few more.
She stood in front of someone who copied every move she made. She put her palm out, hoping that the girl in front of her would too - and this girl did not disappoint. Only to have her victory thrown under the bus since her touch did not feel any warmth. It was cold. The calculated kind that sends chills all over your body. She bowed her head and liquid glitters started forming on her counter.
This is not pain. This is not loss. This not heartbreak.
Shoot to kill. Bang, bang, bang! Off went the pangs of her heart.
This is void. And the feeling is universal.
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